If you haven't and you some day plan to get married, I have one piece of stellar advice for you...DON'T DO IT. Seriously. Elope.
Ranger Guy and I have been planning our wedding now for over a year and I'll tell you right now it is not at all a fancy occasion...our sons are all wearing black tuxedo tee-shirts...but it has been a gigantic pain in my ass. I honestly do not know why this kind of thing stresses me out so much, but rest assured...IT DOES. I think it is possible I was born with a deficiency in girly girl hormones. You know the ones that make you care about color schemes and frilly tablecloths. There are all these things that are apparently very important to weddings that I don't give a single shit about. Not. A. Single. Shit.
For example...decorations. I'm sorry, I don't understand the point of spending hundreds of dollars on centerpieces, table cloths, aisle runners, or color coordinated candies. What do people do with all these things after the wedding? Is there some sort of landfill somewhere just filled with old wedding stuff? And renting them makes even less sense because it's just as expensive as buying them and you end up with nothing to show for it.
My other big issue, and believe me there are countless small ones, is RSVPs. No one RSVPs these days. Obviously there are some people who are a given will attend but it's terribly difficult to plan the number of chairs, tables, and/or cake when no one RSVPs. As it stands the amount of cake I will be ordering there is a good chance that my children will be eating it for generations to come. They will be thrilled.
And lastly...we have decided to write our own wedding vows. Now my future husband-guy is pretty creative. He like writes poetry and stuff. My strong point is sarcasm and wit. And I'm not exactly sure how my sarcasm and wit will translate into wedding vows. Mine will be all ridiculous and funny. His all sweet and romantic.
So, heed my words of advice...Elope, dear friends, Elope.
